Harrington and I were about 13 years apart in age. He was older than me. We were the classic May-December couple. Were we doomed from the start with much age difference? I cannot recall how we met. For the life of me I have racked my brain and cannot recall our meeting. I can just remember we "were." I truly loved him and isn't that the way it is? Tthe woman always invests the most as far as feelings. He was a builder who had later added real estate to his resume. He had some money when I met him. In his prime which was 10-15 years before I met him he must have been like The Donald in his own circle. He had contructed lots of buildings around town and had a 5 beroom house, multi cars and lots of blingg. Cashflow was like water.

When I met him it was after a long divorce with custody issues. The house had been sold and he was down to 3 cars and was living in some of the real estate he rented to others. He still had good cash flow, I guess becasuse for the most part he treated me very well. We only went to the best restaurants and the best places. Gone were nights at the local hangout or bars. I was attending formal parties, galas and benefits. I had to dress for the occassion. Being a process at heart that was right up my alley. Noone I have ever dated before ever dressed well enough for me and never had any money you could shake a stick at.

I think that over time while age was not a factor for him, some of his friends began to pressure him. I recall going to 3 separate formal affairs and sitting at a table with his friends. He was well known and very gregarious. He had lots of friends. Well at these 3 particular parties, I was sitting and someoem would come over and speak to him. He and the friend would then go off to speak to someone else. I was left alone. This, I thought was very rude. I mentioned it to him and he apologized but bells began to go off for me. Age was becoming a factor and it eventually became his mountain. One other event that really stood out in my mind was a charity casino event that he invited me to. I had bought a fushia backless satin dress for the occasion. The back had a satin bow with rhinestone accents at the waist. Damn! I was going to look good. He told me it was on a particular weekend, then called and said he had the date wrong..it was for the following weekend. I thought nothing of it. Anyone can get a date mixed up. So I put my dress away for the following weekend. We did nothing the weekend that was changed. I did speak to him on the phone that Saturday night.

The next weekend came and I put on my pink dress and he picked me up in his tux. He was quite debonair in a suit I must say. We went to the hotel and there was no charity casino gala. It had been the weekend before. A big hammer came up and hit me in the head. I, to this day ,do believe that he lied to me and did not take me to the gala because a vast majority of his friends who had been giving him pressure about me would be there. He claimed it was a mixup but I know the truth. I was very angry. We talked about it. I let it go but I did not forget.

We dated for about 3.5 years and over time I grew to love him. Love conquers all, doesn't it? We like to think so. The reality is, it does not. (Love Calculator) Some things are bigger than love. I kept that to myself for about a year. Why is is that women cannot say "I love you" to a man first for fear of scaring him away? We all wait for a sign that the time is right. So I waited and would get my sign to tell him that I loved him. We had great moments together eating out, movies, plays, shows, dinners at home. We never went on a trip together. That may have been a clue that all was not well. (I feel the rule now is that if you do not go on vacation together, the relationship is not a good one or not as solid as you may think.) We had magical moments together.

Our 2nd Christmas was coming and he asked me to go home with him for Christmas to have dinner with his parents, and sisters. The sign had come!!! (That is the sign and you know it!) Dinner with parents. We had planned to have dinner with planned to have dinner with then the weekend before December 25th and then come home and have a private dinner at my house on Christmas day. I was ready! Christmas would be the day. I had gotten the sign!

More to come.